Princess Margaret

[Hester]

I’ve always had the impression that Margaret was a vain narcissist and a bully.

[Miss Marple]

I think we are imagining it way too romantic ... If she had really and truely loved Peter Townsend that much - she would have married him. Her family would have made sure that she was well provided for and she would have been still included in social functions - but, she would have had to distance herself from the court. And that was the point. She wanted the big functions, the important (tiara) events etc. more than him.

Plus: It is a very romantic idea that there is only THE one out there for you. Luckily that is not the case. Let's say normal people marrying other normal people find 1:100 suitable for a partner (must work that way, otherwise the divorce rate would be way higher). She was not compatible with the man she finanally chose as a husband. 

[fairy]

I agree with Miss Marple that there is not "one soulmate" - or if there is, a good many never meet him/her out of the 8 billion on this planet...
I also don't buy the concept of " if it had been the real love - than she would have married him against all odds", because quite frankly, a lot of people are pretty insecure and tend not to go against family and society esp. if they have been extremely involved in your life.
If like Margaret you have been raised on the concept of us four and "the royal family is set apart from the others" I can readily believe that she simply got cold feet.
Of course there are people who give up everything and everyone to follow their dreams (be it the person they want to be with or a specific profession they want to pursue which their family opposes) but that takes a specific person and many of us are not made  to jump into the cold water alone - we as humans are a very social creature and we tend to follow the rules set by family and society because we feel much safer that way...

Alas the idea to give it all up for love is oh so romantic and of course, each and every prince and princess has either stated or was asked that she/he of course would always choose love over their duty. In the end, it didn't really pan out for the dissenters, at least there are as many unhappy ones as unhappy stayed ins...

[Miss Marple]

The big problem in life is that you live forward and you understand things only looking back. There are very often decisions you wonder what would have happened if you had decided differently. People change, especially when you are married for a long time. Picking a spouse can be tricky and go wrong - no matter how careful you are.

In love things, people tend to dream a lot and assume that it was THE relationship they missed - compared to a few frogs they might have kissed. Balanced people usually have more fulfilling relationships (also "normal" friendships). Margret did not seem very balanced - as everyone she had good and bad sides but there are numerous reports that she was a bit aloof and not always nice - so every husband would have had a hard time - at least at times.

If there is some drama involved (like with Margaret) people assume it was "THE" chance. My great-aunt had a good few friends who got married just before WWI - they were often hushed marriages and the women in question were 16 or 17 and after the war, with all the added problems, neither of these marriages was especially happy and -with a bit more thinking- they would not have taken place in the first place. It was more an enduring of a wrong decision. One friend was widowed at the age of 18 and never re-married and convinced herself and all her friends that she lost "the ideal husband that could not be replaced" - she lived 70 years as a widow which was sad and I found that incredibly romantic when I was a teenager, but I think if she had given love another chance and not put husband #1 (who surely was a fine young man) on a pedestral, she might have been way happier in her life. I think the same kind of happened to Margaret.

The media add to the pressure. Even normal people can never be sure that their marriage works out. If that happens in the public eye ... The upper class seems to have a fair share of really unhappy marriages ...

[fairy]

Yeah the one "that got away" will always be the one who never put a foot wrong or would never do something offensive. They also never age, never argue, never really leave.. the classic widow-problem.
However, dwelling on a "lost chance" be it the partner one never got to keep, the job, one was "forced to give up", the many regrets one might have over the course of a life is not very healthy.
If anything it keeps you from enjoying life.
Was Mragarets endless almost pathetic desperate quest for "more life - more fun - more more" a result of her love disappointment or was it the other way around? Did she set herself up for failure with Townsend? Did she choose him, knowing this relationship would never be allowed and the endless speculation and pity would grant her a unique place in the limelight?