The Music Thread

[Paulina]

Sam Cooke
Lost and Lookin

https://youtu.be/zR5sua82dN8

[Paulina]

Anne-Lie Ryde
Regniga Natt

https://youtu.be/X8__bwXIKxs

[Paulina]

Madeleine Peyroux
You’re Gonna Make Me Lonesome When You Go

 https://youtu.be/8YGgV1WDL38

[Paulina]

Dean Martin
Memories Are Made of This

https://youtu.be/fzS3TpBE6QQ

[Paulina]

Hurray for the Riff Raff
St. Roch Blues

https://youtu.be/GsfNmg9dGpM

[Paulina]

The above songs I posted tonight are songs I listen to when I visit my husbands grave. Sometimes if there is someone around, they indicate they like or appreciate the songs.

This thread reminds me of the old Deadspin Up All Night, a sub part of the old Gawker sites. Deadspin was a sports site with exceptional writing, and the music thread of sharing.

I’m rather sad tonight.  My husband has been gone now 13 years and my 15 year old daughter is off the chain—rude, contemptuous, misses school once a week or more, poor grades, snarly attitude, some drinking and vaping and bad attitude. Rare are the times when she’s polite, thoughtful, considerate, or helpful. She was such a sweet kid. I don’t know who she is anymore.

I miss him more than ever and am lonelier than I expected this far out.

 My son, now 20, and with his own difficulties, was awful at that age and says she’ll grow out of it, like he did (mostly, but there are other problems). I don’t think I’ll make it. I’m worn down and burnt out on the solo parenting at all times.

At least I like my job and my friends. But since the pandemic, I’m more out of touch with some of them, especially the ones not local or in Europe. And not wanting to talk about my kids with anyone or how things are. I’m so disappointed on so many levels. The kids, me, choices made over the years.

RD is a fun distraction. Impassioned, witty, smart posters, who engage and comment and share. I look forward to seeing the comments and threads every day.

[Paulina]

The Sundays
Here’s Where The Story Ends

https://youtu.be/FHsip5xOenQ

[Paulina]

Marta Topferova

Amoroso Guajira

https://youtu.be/NyUS4cw5Ka4

[Paulina]

Namib Marimbas
Grazing Back Home
(Most soothing song ever!)

https://youtu.be/jeRl6uGIzqw

[Diogenes]

Namib Marimbas
Grazing Back Home
(Most soothing song ever!)

https://youtu.be/jeRl6uGIzqw

Thank you, Paulina.  Their sound is as beautiful as their country.
Peace.
Diog

[Paulina]

Namib Marimbas
Grazing Back Home
(Most soothing song ever!)

https://youtu.be/jeRl6uGIzqw

Thank you, Paulina.  Their sound is as beautiful as their country.
Peace.
Diog

 

[anneboleyn]

Paulina, you sound like you are doing an amazing job. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to be a solo parent and you’ve been doing it for thirteen years! I’m sure your daughter is going through some things - hormones, puberty, grief, and all that. Her behaviour won’t last forever.

It’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when you are in the thick of the darkness though.

Thank you for sharing your vulnerability with us. You sound like an amazing mom and your children are lucky to have you. 

[Paulina]

Aww. Thanks Annebolyn. I appreciate it. I know you went through your extraordinarily hard time last year, bad guy, difficult ending of that relationship. And you were vulnerable here, too. I feel like RD is my safe space. It's the only place I post anywhere on the internet.

I wasn't sure who would find the music thread, but I was on a tear last night finding songs that made me sad and more sad. It's like you find the abyss sometimes and jump right in with your soundtrack under your arm.

Got in another fight with my daughter today because she hasn't cleaned the bathroom from last weekend, even though she promised, and I gave her an advance on her allowance to do it, and she just blames, blames, blames me for every last poor decision she makes. It's like we never have a reasonable conversation that sounds rational. It may pass, but in my worst moments, I wonder if she has BPD. The therapist thought that was reaching, but then later said our difficulties were beyond her expertise and quit. It all started when she asked to go to the grave and I said, "Sure, how about after you clean the bathroom?" And she hit the roof. I'm just stunned she expects things without doing the work or keeping her promises first.

Thank you for the kind words. I just need to remind myself not to engage and to stay really neutral with her most of the time. Very hard to do. I will re read what you wrote and try to internalize it. This too shall pass is what my mom says to me. She also reminds me that nagging doesn't work. I don't nag, but I do remind, but to a teenager, maybe it looks like the same thing.

Hugs.

[CyrilSebastian]

The Lennon Sisters ~ Serenade of the Bells   
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48MPzKigWQY

[Paulina]

Beautiful Cyril. I used to watch the Lawrence Welk show with my great grandparents.