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Author Topic: James Middleton - Pipsters and Kates brother  (Read 11902 times)
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fairy

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« Reply #60 on: January 22, 2023, 11:09:38 PM »

You never really get "over it". And you need not. But it does get easier. And new pets do not wipe out the memory or the love you had for their predecessors. But you love them just as well, perhaps differently but not less.
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« Reply #61 on: January 23, 2023, 02:34:05 AM »

He posted a video someone made for him and message.

https://twitter.com/cambr...;t=IhKsp9l_RsJ3x72jE0iKAg
« Last Edit: January 23, 2023, 02:39:46 AM by Aubiette » Logged
loveofenglishtradition

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« Reply #62 on: January 23, 2023, 05:24:26 PM »

We have two three year old cats now and I adore them, but we had three long lived kitties before . One passed on her own at 18, and one passed on her own at 21, but our boy kitty had to be put down at 20 and I'm still not over that and it was over 5 years ago.

Thank you Jolene for sharing this.

Maybe that is my biggest problem about Oscar. He was so ill at the end, cancer and what not. And the doctor wanted to put him down directly. But, Oscar didn't seem to want to go, he fought and again and again he recovered a little bit and wanted to cuddle up. And each time he started to eat or drink again, we saw that there was still life in him.
He just didn't do as the favour to just lie down and die.

I just couldn't have let him go, although he probably suffered. Fnally we had to take him to the doctor and let him put to sleep. What is still bothering me is the question if I did the right thing, should I have let him put down earlier to end his sufferings or was it right that I waited so long. When I am thinking of him I always ask him to forgive me, if he has suffered too long (silly, but that is how I feel and probably will always feel)




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loveofenglishtradition

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« Reply #63 on: January 23, 2023, 05:43:57 PM »

And also thanks to all  who have written about their feelings of loosing their cats (or dogs). It is a comfort to me that I am not alone with my grief
I was very much alone two years ago, many people (except my closest family) did not understand my grief at all and were no consolation.
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anneboleyn

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« Reply #64 on: January 23, 2023, 06:05:37 PM »

I think often about getting a pet for the companionship, but losing them would be so hard.
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« Reply #65 on: January 23, 2023, 07:31:49 PM »

We have two three year old cats now and I adore them, but we had three long lived kitties before . One passed on her own at 18, and one passed on her own at 21, but our boy kitty had to be put down at 20 and I'm still not over that and it was over 5 years ago.

Thank you Jolene for sharing this.

Maybe that is my biggest problem about Oscar. He was so ill at the end, cancer and what not. And the doctor wanted to put him down directly. But, Oscar didn't seem to want to go, he fought and again and again he recovered a little bit and wanted to cuddle up. And each time he started to eat or drink again, we saw that there was still life in him.
He just didn't do as the favour to just lie down and die.

I just couldn't have let him go, although he probably suffered. Fnally we had to take him to the doctor and let him put to sleep. What is still bothering me is the question if I did the right thing, should I have let him put down earlier to end his sufferings or was it right that I waited so long. When I am thinking of him I always ask him to forgive me, if he has suffered too long (silly, but that is how I feel and probably will always feel)





My last dog was the most adorable little darling and she was sick at the end. Our vet, who was not a people person to put it mildly told me two years before Elsa passed, that she was not treatable anymore and should be put down. I rejected that thought vehemently and went to another vet, who told me, that while Elsa was old and sick, she still enjoyed life with us. She still wanted to go for her walks, was happy when we were around and ate and drank normally. We gave her pain medications and spoiled her to no end. Finally when the end came, it came without any doubt or uncertainty and we (I!) were able to accept it.
I think that in hindsight we were selfish and perhaps we waited until there really was no other option, but I feel that any pet or any person who simply can't anymore, communicates this somehow and I strongly believe that when the day comes, when they can't take it anymore, you just know.
You don't have to ask him for forgiveness, you have done nothing but love him till the very end.
Most animals that want to die and can't take it anymore, draw away from contact, they almost hide -behind a sofa, in a quiet corner, they don't follow you around and ask for cuddles.
He wasn't ready and you weren't either. So it was the right decision.

In any case, a plea to all pet parents: please do not leave your pet alone at the vet to be put down. It is the hardest thing ever, but the greatest gift to be there with them, try to make sure, there is no fear and only comfort for them.
So many vets say, that the poor darlings whose owners aren't there are so anxious, because they feel abandoned and look around for their owners. What a heart-breaking way to go, if it can be avoided. Which I know is not always the case, but when you can do this for them, please do.
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« Reply #66 on: January 23, 2023, 08:07:15 PM »

We held off as long as we could with out male kitty, but he was clearly ready to go.  Cry I bawled the whole weekend. We buried them in our backyard and planted a shrub that seemed to fit their coloring. One cat was a tuxedo so we planted a white azalea on her grave, one kitty had a very fluffy white belly so we planted a fluffy white hydrangea, and our boy was a fluffy orange tabby and we planted an orange colored azalea. We call those plants by the cats' names.
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« Reply #67 on: January 23, 2023, 09:06:26 PM »

Our last dog loved red, from his big Kong toy to eating tomatoes, raspberries and strawberries he helped himself to right out of the garden. So he has a red crabapple tree. We too refer to the trees and shrubs as so and so's tree, bush etc.

Our present vet has a very good procedure for putting a pet to sleep. After the necessary forms are done a vet tech gives a shot that relaxes your pet, and you spend the next fifteen or twenty minutes petting and talking to them until they come in and give the final shot. They do you give you the option to leave at that point but we always stay. After your kitty or dog has passed you are allowed to stay as long as you like and then exit out a side door.

I will add that since the advent of cell phones we've called or let them know we were in the parking lot and only come in when they were ready for us. So no sitting in the waiting room.

We've had to do this a lot, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

AB, honey, it's hard to let them go but they are worth the grief because they bring so much joy in life.
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« Reply #68 on: January 23, 2023, 09:39:26 PM »

We lost both of our senior labradors during lockdown, just 8 weeks apart. It was just heartbreaking. The 17 year old collapsed, and for 2 days lay in a coma while begged assorted  vets to come help her over the bridge. I was ready to throw myself on the mercy of my horse vet, who does make house calls. In the end I found the wonderful Dr Viano https://www.petdignifiedeuthanasia.com/ who came to the house was so kind to the dogs and the humans. She explained everything she was doing and was so nice to the crying humans. Anyone who is in NY and needs help with this, please call her.
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« Reply #69 on: January 28, 2023, 07:43:40 PM »

Article by James for The Times. I’m crying.  Cry

James Middleton: Farewell Ella, the dog who saved my life
‘Whether you have had a dog or not, all of us have a time in our lives when we struggle to make sense of loss, and nothing can prepare you for that void’

https://archive.is/vcQpy
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« Reply #70 on: January 29, 2023, 09:11:35 AM »

Article by James for The Times. I’m crying.  Cry

James Middleton: Farewell Ella, the dog who saved my life
‘Whether you have had a dog or not, all of us have a time in our lives when we struggle to make sense of loss, and nothing can prepare you for that void’

https://archive.is/vcQpy

I’ve come here to post tge sane articke. He seens to be such a nice bloke, fragile but nice and resilient.
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« Reply #71 on: January 29, 2023, 02:59:22 PM »

Article by James for The Times. I’m crying.  Cry

James Middleton: Farewell Ella, the dog who saved my life
‘Whether you have had a dog or not, all of us have a time in our lives when we struggle to make sense of loss, and nothing can prepare you for that void’

https://archive.is/vcQpy

I'm so very happy for James that he had Ella to be there for him through his darkest times and that she was there when he first met his future wife Alizee. I had my own Ella, a grey mackerel tabby named Lucy.
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Lady Willoughby

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« Reply #72 on: January 29, 2023, 04:06:16 PM »

Article by James for The Times. I’m crying.  Cry

James Middleton: Farewell Ella, the dog who saved my life
‘Whether you have had a dog or not, all of us have a time in our lives when we struggle to make sense of loss, and nothing can prepare you for that void’

https://archive.is/vcQpy

I'm so very happy for James that he had Ella to be there for him through his darkest times and that she was there when he first met his future wife Alizee. I had my own Ella, a grey mackerel tabby named Lucy.

That’s a very sweet article. Good for James. He’s done a really fantastic job talking publicly about his struggles.

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« Reply #73 on: January 29, 2023, 05:13:41 PM »

It’s so sweet of his sisters and parents how they’ve supported him. I know that we have already said it but the middletons have indeed raise their children well. It must be difficult for him and Pippa to have to navigate a position in the world after their sister marriage. He is the baby of the family and it’s so refreshing that a man to share openly his feelings and darkness and to show that men can be fragile too. Farewell Ella and to all the fourleg family members we all lost
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loveofenglishtradition

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« Reply #74 on: January 29, 2023, 05:26:13 PM »

Article by James for The Times. I’m crying.  Cry

James Middleton: Farewell Ella, the dog who saved my life
‘Whether you have had a dog or not, all of us have a time in our lives when we struggle to make sense of loss, and nothing can prepare you for that void’

https://archive.is/vcQpy
/quote]





I do too. What a wonderful and moving text he has written! What a amiable nice man he must be.
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